Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.
by The Dalai Lama (via drapetomania
(Source: seabois, via batheinconciousness)
Hello pretty people! I have just created a public Facebook page to promote the gigs i will be playing at very soon!! Also in the midst of recording various originals, like it to keep in the loop :) https://www.facebook.com/mikylaschuster?ref_type=bookmark
Kyla is actually a very talented musician, her soundcloud in case anybody is curious, especially to any kiwis who might be online at the moment =]
I feel so dumb in school. Everyone just GETS whats being taught and I pretend I understand everything but I really don't. I think the main reason I don't understand anything is because I lack faith in myself for doing well academically. But then I lack faith in myself for doing anything at all. I'm actually good at nothing and this sucks because with the competition out there, I'll never amount to anything :( asked by Anonymous
I’m glad you recognize that it’s actually a confidence/faith issue. Believe me, a lot of people have been there, myself included. You’re not alone. I remember I ended up in the lowest English classes for years 8 and 9. And it had little to do with my potential, I could read, write, interpret/analyse perfectly well… But somewhere along the way, I lost complete faith in my ability, I had no confidence in myself. And because of that, rather than make an effort, I simply didn’t try. And if I did “try”, I deliberately held myself back. The same thing happened again in University, for reasons I won’t go into, I ended up losing confidence in my academic abilities. Because I lacked confidence in myself, rather than make an effort, again I simply didn’t try. And in light of the courses I was taking and the University I was attending; that wasn’t as option. The consequence was that my marks plummeted into the earth, which resulted in less confidence, which equals more avoidance… A vicious cycle!
Two of the kids I have tutored over the last few years: One of them came to me when he was getting 30’s (As in 30 percent) for his maths tests. By the time he was finished, this guy had an average in the 60’s. His marks literally doubled. Another one of the kids I tutor went from 50’s to high 80’s and low 90’s…. And both of them disliked maths because they lacked belief in themselves. And the only thing that really changed throughout that entire time was their confidence. It wasn’t me, I wasn’t a good tutor. The trick to their success was this: We started from the very bottom, the foundation of their maths courses, and we worked out way up. That was it. We took baby steps, starting with the most simplest questions, and we stayed at those questions for as long as it was necessary. Soon enough they became comfortable at that level, and we would take another step. And another step. And another… Over time, they would get more and more answers correct, and you would see their confidence increase. Soon enough these kids find themselves enjoying their work, because they realize that they can get it right! They start working outside of our tutoring sessions, messaging me when they need help, and bringing questions to ask.
Me tutoring helped… because rather than have to search for the answer/explanation themselves (which can be quite hard, and time consuming), I could simply explain it to them right then and there. And that made the entire process a lot quicker. But the truth is, they didn’t even really need me. But having a tutor there, did help a lot.
It’s as you say. It really does boil down to confidence. When we struggle with course work, and try to study, we usually become overwhelmed, stressed, and frustrated with ourselves. At that point our natural impulse is to avoid the situation, rather than confront it. Ultimately though, this does more harm than good. We deny the reality of our circumstances for the illusion of comfort. At the end of the day, it’s far better to study, feel those negative feelings (and learn to let go of them), than to avoid any study that makes us stressed. But because studying brings up all those negative feelings, we find temporary relief in avoiding it. The more we avoid the study, the more we fall behind… The more stressful studying becomes, the more we avoid it… Like I said, a vicious cycle =]
What are you having difficulty studying? Maybe I can provide some good resources for you, or even we can discuss your course work if you like? I am happy to talk it all through with you, we can find some solutions, ways to get you back on track. School is very stressful, I know, and I’ll help out if I can.